It is currently Sun Apr 23, 2017 3:59 am

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 5 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Mockerfucker Jones
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 10:23 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 5:10 pm
Posts: 660
Image

1T.) Derrick Barnett 6’3 263 EDGE Tennessee- “Say ‘what’ again, I dare you, I double dare you MOTHERFUCKER! SAY ‘WHAT’ ONE MORE GODDAMN TIME!” What? Again, Drama? Yep. I’m trading up yet again for this proud carrier of the “Bad Motherfucker” wallet. My logic this time is that if guys like Watt, Willis, and Bowser are all projected to be drafted before pick 30 then I’m trading up for the best of the bunch.

2.) Josh Jones 6’1 220 S North Carolina St- “Dean Jones? That’s the same name of the actor in Herbie the Love Bug.” This Motherfucker Jones is no love bug. Kid hits like a Mack Truck. He’s the ideal hybrid safety/linebacker who will eventually replace Mike Mitchell whose declining play often causes me to groan, “MMMOOOTHERFFFUCKERRRR!”

3.) Traded for my guy Barnett

3T.) Zay Jones 6’2 201 WR East Carolina- “MOTHERFUCKER!” was my reaction when I heard the news Megatard Martavis Bryant was suspended for the season. Not one receiver stepped up to fill his void. If the analytical temptress, Cynthia Frelund, were sitting next to me, she’d tell me that Zay Jones and his NCAA career best 399 receptions would dramatically upgrade the receiving corps. Then I’d bend her over and show her the 50 states.

4.) Sidney Jones 6’1 186 CB Washington- ”You drag race? In a Prius???” “I don’t win a lot.” If TomBert can keep Senquez Golson who has yet to play an NFL snap on the roster for two years, surely they can wait a few months for this Motherfucker Jones to recover from his Achilles injury.

5.) Bucky Hodges 6’6 257 Virginia Tech- “I really fucked her over and that’s how I got the name, Motherfucker Jones.” Those Motherfuckers over a CBS really fucked over this Hodges kid all the way down to the 5th round. I was never buying the Jimmy Graham comparisons, but he could be a nice weapon in the red zone and a “grand larceny” pick here in rd 5.

6.) Traded for my guy Barnett

7.) Aaron Jones 5’9 206 RB UTEP- I hope this kid isn’t related to former Steelers’ defensive end Aaron Jones. THAT Motherfucker sucked!

Thanks as always for reading. Still 9 days until the draft. Just passing some time with another mock. “You can’t win a marathon without putting some band aids on your nipples.”


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Mockerfucker Jones
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 11:03 pm 
Online

Joined: Sat Aug 20, 2016 10:36 pm
Posts: 588
Love the first 2.....

_________________
The problem is that you don't even know what virtue means, but you think you do.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Mockerfucker Jones
PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2017 8:08 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jul 08, 2014 8:46 pm
Posts: 1208
Love the players...

I think Zay Jones is gone in the 2nd round.

"I can't go around with a Disney-ass name like that."


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Mockerfucker Jones
PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2017 11:28 am 
Offline

Joined: Sun Jul 13, 2014 12:48 pm
Posts: 675
Would love it if Sidney and Bucky fell to the end of the 4th and 5th respectively, just don't see it....but it does look like....

..."Well Shabbat Shalom, somebody's circumcised!"...and..."Oh, I'm sorry Dale. I'm a squirter."

...wait...."Your first name is... Motherfucker?"

Good stuff, Drama....


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Mockerfucker Jones
PostPosted: Wed Apr 19, 2017 3:59 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jul 08, 2014 9:14 pm
Posts: 2774
Location: Upstate NY
Being that my favorite word since I was a kid is Fuck and any variation Fuck is used, this is my favorite mock hands down.

Great fuckin stuff!


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 5 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
FORUM RULES --- PRIVACY POLICY




Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group